Are We All the Same?

Listening to Dan Savage's Lovecast on iTunes and a caller was commenting if there's a larger percentage of defectives in gay men and catholic men. Dan agreed because gay men and catholic men are taught from a very young age that sex or being gay is wrong. So they have more guilt and hang up about it than the other populations. Self hate, kink, madonna-whore complex, crying after sex and other weird behaviors usually comes from these condemnations. People who loves kink love it because it violates certain taboos in society, probably they are challenging what people told them not to do. Honestly, I was in a catholic boarding school overseas and there weren't that much condemnations and there were any mentioning of sex, which I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

I have known that I was gay since I was around 14 and I was ok with it. There were no hang ups, no guilt. I did think about it will probably means that my family name ends with me since I'm the only child and having children (especially a son) is quite important for the Chinese. But since I'm a bastard and my mom is dead, I don't feel as much pressure to do that as the other gay Chinese might feel. I have known quite a couple of gay Asian guys who got married even though they knew they were gay just to have children and have their parents off their back. (Secretly I really feel it's selfish and immoral for them to ruin their wife's lives knowingly so.)

All my uncles are still single until their late 30s early 40s and lived with my grandma and me, I have not much clue on how a straight family is like. I once posted about being in Hooters and discovering the life of a straight guy. Sports channels, beer, horrible chicken wings and girls with big boobs in t-shirts. The only thought I had was that they shouldn't really allow young kids in the establishment and I was disappointed with the chicken wings, I heard so much good stuff about it and it was crusty.

The guys in Kung Fu were quite funny too. One time the latino instructor was trying to show us on some moves on a DVD that he made and end up showing us porn. "I don't know who was watching porn on here." Um, right. Stripper talks, every other sentence starts with my wife, my girlfriend... The only difference between straight guys talk and gay guys talk is the unmistakable sense of ego, comparing who's cojones are bigger. I nearly cracked up last night when we were doing squatting exercises, the instructor was bouncing his ass up and down for like 5 minutes showing us how stable our legs and flexible our waists needed to be. We all followed his lead and bouncing our butts up and down like we were bottoming. I didn't know Kung Fu would help my sex life but apparently it will.


Don't get their crusty, crummy wings no matter what the middle-aged waitress with her fake boobs tells you.