What I Want

(Other than eating this and not getting fat...)

ES called Friday night at 1 am and proceed to talk my ears off for the following 90 minutes. I'm really not complaining, in fact I'm glad that she feels comfortable enough to do that although sometimes I wonder if she'd been drinking... lol. It's nice to catch up with her and she's a great gal pal.

Losing my job, low financial security, boyfriendless, and a small social circle have rendered me to be lost in life. I think ES sensed my lost of direction and asked me what I want in life and I had to think really hard to come up with anything at all, so she laughed. It's a good thing that you're still in your early 30s, you'd still have time to think, if you're in your 40s and still don't know what you want then it'd be too late.It is a valid point and I have to dig deep.

In life, she wanted kids and a family, to be able to work in the HIV/AIDS field and that's exactly what she did. Me, I want to meet a good guy to settle down with, I want a house and adopt before 40 or at least get a puppy. (Sorry if you find me lumping babies and dogs together offensive, but you know what I mean.) I just turned 33 that means I have about 3 years to find a mate and have 4 years of alone time with that guy to build a solid relationship before getting married (Unnecessary but it'd be nice) and get a kid. If my partner have the heart and we have the space and money, and even as unrealistic as it sounds I can seeing myself adopting a whole bunch of kids throughout my life.

Career-wise is a toughie. Another friend asked me what my passion is and I have no idea. I enjoy video games, music, movies, cooking but I think my upbringing do not allow me to see that these things are in anyway practical and those are not things that would yield a decent income unless you have connections and real talent which I would have to say I lack. Sometimes I would wish that I actually have studied culinary during my undergraduate years since I was studying at in a college famous for that program. Although those jobs are all high stress jobs and I can be quite nasty when I'm stressed.

Thinking back to the reason I chose IT was partly because I had a great time working at A.C. Nielsen, a survey research company. I like to get to know what people like and the reason behind it, and since I like math and statistics and now that I know how to deal with data it might just be the field I want to explore. If, with luck, I get a job at UPenn, I'd be able to take class in survey research, SAS (since most statistics job require experience in that program, even my friends swear that it's as easy as Excel.), and perhaps marketing. Maybe it'll allow me to acquire an MBA. That wouldn't be too bad, right?

I think I'd like market research. Took me some time but I'm glad I've figure it out. Although I'd be interested to learn about music production and all that but it'd be a bit unrealistic and unstable, that could wait until later in life as a hobby, no? And I'm still enthralled with my idea of opening up a non-profit restaurant but that's a bit too far fetched as well. I'll just have to see where life takes me.