Sweet. Dull. Pain.

>> Tuesday, January 20, 2009


So we kicked out the old president and got ourselves a new one. I rarely watch these political event, but it's very historical to have a first African-American president. People might shun that they are all the same and they might be, but I still thing it's pretty sweet. Every gay guy's eyes were on Michelle and her outfit worrying that she might repeat her last disaster, but she came out with a gold and white lace number with a sash to echo her daughters' outfits. It's quite precious, although it stands out a lot in the cold and everyone else was wearing some tamed colored coats. Rick Warren's prayer was severely written in the spirit for acceptance, I guess he got whipped into shape.

I know we shouldn't put so much expectation and pressure on Obama, he couldn't honestly fix everything in 4 years, especially the harm done by Bush was so severe. But if he can really do what he promised in his speech, America will be in a much better place. You do have to love how he made a speech about how bad a shape the country is in and how bad a job the former president had done and then sit right back next to the now ex-president. I do wonder what Georgie is thinking seeing that many people cheer for the new guy with that much enthusiasm, probably more acceptance than he had gotten for years. Maybe he also noticed that everyone was happy that he's leaving?

Funny thing for me was people cheered very loudly when they hear Yo-Yo Ma's name. I guess out of the minority quartet (Jewish guy, Black guy and a Hispanic girl), he's the better known one. That tickled me a little. Dick Cheney in a wheelchair just make him look so much more evil. me and my friend were wondering weather that walking cane had a gun or a blade inside, I thought it could be mustard gas. He's looking more and more like the Penguin in Batman. The poet was a miss for me though, we were wondering where Maya Angelou is and my friend yelled "Damn Cheney!", I like to imagine that Ms. Angelou fought bravely and rendered Cheney in that chair with her wooden spoons Kill Bill style. Despite my concerns, nothing bad happened so hopefully the country can start a brand new chapter.


Life is dull, or rather my life is dull but I'm not talking about that part now. Rest assured that I'm taking measures to change it. During a cold last week, I was caught by a smell in my apartment. I thought it was burnt PVC coming from my radiator, maybe some wire was caught around it and melting. Until I remember that I have encountered this smell before when I was around 20 in Hong Kong. It's a rather dull sweet smell, a bit waxy as if it's beewax and the oddest of things, it comes from me. I remember how the smell followed me for weeks driving me insane but it eventually went away and I have no clue why it has come to be. I mean I'm a sweet guy, but not this literal. Signs of diabetes, nasal cancer? Or maybe I just ate something wrong and it's some kind of reaction? I have no clue, although it had subsided a bit since then.

I've been casually on a low carb diet, not intentional. I was talking to CuteCub about a low carb recipe that I liked and I made it, and afterwards I thought might as well continue in this regime. Somehow I've lost 10 pounds. It could be due to a combination of diet, being sick and dehydration, but hey one of my resolutions have been fulfilled. I have been on it for roughtly 10 days but it was blown to hell during a day of Mahjong, they bought hoagies and then we went out for Chinese food. I think I'll resume my diet for a while and see where it leads. If I lost 25 more pounds I'd be in the best shape of my life.


I think morose would be a more appropriate word. I guess I assigned too much importance in my relationship with CuteCub and I'm paying for it. Sure, I can't expect anything to cater to me but when I'm blown off again and again without telling me ahead of time and have me waiting like a fool and then avoid communications afterwards. I think I have the right to be upset no matter how self-inflicted it is. He could be just having a bad week but I hate feeling unimportant. It's true that I like the guy a lot and maybe the circumstances around us are not ideal, so maybe it's best to put it aside. If it cannot be something mutual, it'll be unfair for one or both or us. If the time comes that he finds himself to be alone and needs someone to care for him, I'd like to be there for him.

So my heart is heavier now.

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