The Schedule Conflict

Thursday, Medic Guy worked from 9am to 9pm. I went out to have dinner with ES, MP and EK. It's probably our last time having dinner all together before ES move down to Washington D.C. Medic Guy told me he'll be working all day, so I wasn't expecting anything.

Friday, Medic Guy worked from 9am to 9pm again. I'm surprised on how much he works, he told me he'll probably stay at the hospital for the night because he has to work the exact same hours on Saturday and then call me after work saying that he'll go home because he forgot to bring clothes.

Saturday, same hours, he told me he might come by at night. I made some soup, got him flowers. And then he texted me around 6 saying he 'loves' me. I was quite shocked, we only knew each other for a few days. He doesn't even know me that well, how can he love me? An hour later he texted me again saying he can't come because he's exhausted.

Sunday, I walked around town looking for a vase to put his flowers in, he told me he's gonna be coming over at night and spend the night with me and since he don't need to work tomorrow and I got off for President's day, I really looked forward to spend our first whole day together. Went to buy some steak and potatoes which he said he liked. I plan to make my famous steak au poivre with a marsala reduction, scalloped potato gratin and salad. Got hom around 4 and got a message from him saying he had a really bad day and he won't be able to come by and he just promised the hospital to work tomorrow. I texted him back saying 'okay', but by now I'm fuming.

The flowers are sitting in a corner all wrapped up in their new vase. I made some soup that he told me he likes. I blown off a few guys just because I thought we had plans and I even told them that I'm seeing someone. But my boyfriends don't feel like coming by and yet sends me message saying he loves me and misses me. What's wrong with this picture? I feel worst than when I was single. Given I must care about him enough or else I won't be so pissed off, but we only know each other for a week. If this uncertainty will continue to exist in our relationship, I rather do without. What good is the "I miss you"s if later on he decides he don't need to see me? Of course, he pleas for me not to be mad, but it is not something I can control.

When somone promises me something and not deliver, I get upset and disappointed. Maybe I should stop investing so much in it, that way I won't expect as much. After all, we only knew each other for a week.