The Ideal Relationship

I was catching up with DC last night and we talked about relationship and my recent dates. Although monogamous, DC has the same thought as I did in grade school, in that it is hard to imagine spending the next 50 years with one and only one person. More like he has a hard time imagining having sex with one and only one person.

Understandable, I have been with Principe for six loving years but near the end our sex life was reduced to once or twice a week, comparing to the hot start we had. Sex up to a point will get mundane and routine and it cannot support a relationship on its own. While love may grow, sex dwindles. So it is important to recognize them as two different things.

Instead of cheating behind your lover's back, some couple choose to have an open relationship. Once a trust and understanding has been established firmly, they could sleep around with other people as long as it is okay with their partner. That way they still get their affection and love from their partner while getting their needs for sexual adventures fulfilled from someone else. Of course, that might invite doubts and jealousy, or maybe you go out and meet someone better and ruined the existing relationship.

Some couples insist on playing together when they invite a third sex partner, it could spice up the love life and there would be less chance for problem. Or playing with other couples, that way everyone know who they belong to, minimizing the chance for problems and gain some friends.

Polygamy is another interesting topic. It's illegal in the states, but so is gay marriage. So for us homos, we don't have to conform to the traditional format of "Marriage is a sacred institution between a man and a woman". For us, it could be whatever we want it to be. Personally, I have been in a relation with a gay couple for a year. I recognized that this kind of relationship has a great potential, you'll be in a high income household, the sex is more interesting with the various combinations, it's not as easy to be bored, but it is a very difficult balancing act. If the participants are not mature enough, there would be jealousy and insecurity. "Oh, you like him more than you like me!" It's hard to find equal grounds and it's hard to be attracted to each other equally as much either.

Maybe it's my fondness for RPG games, I can fantasize myself being in a polyamory relationship. Ideally, having 5 participants just like any good RPG games and just enough to fit in a car. Everyone should have different things that they are good at, whether it's cooking and cleaning, car and home repair, gardening, accounting, computers and such... Four of them would have jobs and the other one can be the homemaker, and of course equal parts of tops and bottoms. Better yet, one of each race. And most importantly all of them should be drama-free and know how to play Mahjong or if not, Texas Hold'em. I like the self-sufficient brotherhood/friends/lovers combination of a relationship. I realize it is quite selfish and hard to find but it is, of course, just a fantasy.