On Abortion
>> Tuesday, December 12, 2006
I once told a girl to abort her child. We were in college and she was seeing this boy in school, I think she had a crush on me for a while and I didn't tell her that I am gay until much later. But she was really friendly and she picked on me constantly, writing things on my hand and stuff. She was from Hong Kong too. After I told her my sexuality, we still remained friends and one day we went out to have steak at one of those Australian-themed chain restaurant, she told me that she couldn't eat much because she was feeling sick, especially in the morning, she thought she might have gotten a flu. So I asked her some more and she told me that her body has been acting weird and she has been missing her period for a while. So I thought she could have been pregnant. So I ask her who she has been hanging out with and if they have had sex and if they have been using protection. So she told me about this boy whose family owned a cane farm in Malaysia, and that they did have sex and she was vague about protection. So I told her to buy a home pregnancy test kit and test it at home. She asks me how do I know so much, I don't know how either, but I do wonder why she can be that clueless, especially when you are a girl you run bigger risks.
That night, she called me up crying, saying that she tested positive and asked me what she should do. I told her to talk to the boy and find out if they want to do something about it. If the boy doesn't, there's no point of keeping the child. Since it's very early in the stage, she can get an abortion if she wants to. And if I were her I would abort the child no matter what. She was still in college studying her undergrad, it's too soon to abandon her studies, give birth to a child and struggle to find low-paying job and feed an extra mouth. You'll grow to resent your child/husband for keeping your life in struggle.
Later on, somehow the boy and her got married and moved to Malaysia. She sent me picture of the kid, it's a girl. I don't quite know how her life turned out to be, but in some ways I was glad that she didn't take my advice. I was glad that the boy is responsible enough to wed her, most guys in his age would just run away. The term "baby's daddy" wasn't invented for nothing. Being one of the children who has a deadbeat for a father, I understand how unfair to be in a loveless family. In any rate, I wish her and her baby well.
Now my friend is pregnant and she is really worried that her child might have down syndrome since she's way over 30. She got her test done and she'll now the result come Thursday. I can tell she's nervous. On our way to Mitsuwa, yet again, this past Sunday. She was telling me if the results come out positive, her husband and her are going to get it aborted. Since she already has one, she feel that it is the right thing to do. Because right now it is much more crucial for KEL to have a healthier environment to grow then having a fetus with down syndrome. I'm reassuring her that the chance of her baby having down syndrome is slim to none and she should just relax. Along with the test, she will find out about the child's gender, she was really hoping for a girl, she even have the name picked out. I wish her all the best too.