Feeling Volatile

I live in this old building that is rapidly deteriorating. Once a point in time it used to be a hotel but that was a long, long time ago and since my landlord doesn't give a crap, things are falling apart. After the roof fell around Christmas night, water is straming down from the bathroom upstairs whenever my neighbor is taking a shower or a bath. Water is also mysteriously dripping from another corner of my place. Mysteriously, because there's no water pipes in that area. There's a heater, but it could be a pet as well, although I would have heard some barking of sorts and the ceiling is thin(ner). All these occurences are bringing me down plus my cable is not working properly and I can't watch a lot of local channels and you know how important TV is to me.

I should move, I have been thinking about it. Since I don't like my job and I'm newly single, I want to go somewhere else and start anew. A friend of mine live in San Francisco East Bay area, he's in a studio much like my own, 2 blocks from the BART, 5 minutes from a major supermarket and he pays $5 less than I do. Over in SF I'll be a double majority: Asian and gay. He told me to go to BAJobs.com to find myself a job and the rest will fall into places. It's so doable, but I'm convinced that I really need to learn how to drive first.

Since new year has came by I haven't been feeling quite myself (whatever that means), it must be the season. First I thought I just wanted sex, but after a session with "Big Rick" I realized that what I need is intimacy. However unwise I think it is to think about Principe, I still miss him a whole lot.

One of my Benny Friends RR has changed his profile to the lyrics of Cover Girls' "All That Glitters Isn't Gold" and I think it's for my benefit. Maybe because I haven't contacted him since we went to the Deborah Cox concert, or maybe it's the fact that I told him to go home afterwards, it was 3 am and I was exhausted, maybe he's mad at me now. Although I don't have any intentions for us to be boyfriends, I don't have any intentions to be a heartbreaker either.